Selling to Consumers: It's Mostly About Relationships

When we think of "relationships" we usually think of those that matter most to us: partners, children, parents, friends, and the like. But those aren't just relationships, those are strong, meaningful relationships. There are other relationships, too. Those other relationships are the ones we have when we end up chatting with someone at the neighborhood coffee shop or meeting someone new at the bar while having a cold one.

And what about the relationship with the front desk clerk at the hotel we check into? It only lasts a few minutes, but isn't that a relationship? Or the parent we meet at the playground while our kids are playing. Or the person that talks to us in a retail store...isn't that a relationship? They're not deep, long-term relationships, but they are relationships, right?

Enter Doyle Slayton

My good friend (and rising star sales guru) Doyle Slayton through up quite a post on his blog Wednesday. It's gotten a lot of people thinking and discussing his topic, which is something that I think is very important for all of us in the sales profession (when I last checked, he had dozens of comments on this blog post). His post, "It's nothing personal, it's just business," takes a contrarian point-of-view to the the commonly held belief that selling is all about relationships.

While I understand what Doyle is getting at, and I definitely agree that sales results are king (everything else is just a means to that end), I somewhat disagree with Doyle's point of view, probably because Doyle's sales background and my sales background are in different types of selling.

My post today is about poking holes in Doyle's post (I warned you, Doyle!). The following are several excerpts from Doyle's article (I encourage you to read the whole thing so you can put everything into proper context). I've added some of my B2C-oriented commentary below. I hope you find the "debate" interesting at least, and thought-provoking at best:

“The relationship begins after the sale, not before.” 

Here's my bias, and why I've chosen to offer a differing point-of-view to Doyle's post:

Most of my sales experience, like many B2C and retail salespeople, has involved sales interactions where you must quickly establish rapport and trust (the basis of any relationship, in my opinion), so you can make a sale while the sales opportunity exists. If you sell windows, for instance, you're going to have a 90 minute (more or less) in-home consultation in order to complete the sale. If you close that opportunity often, you'll be a sales superstar. If you never do it, you'll just be one of the long list of salespeople who tried this job but failed at it.

For a salesperson to sell windows in an in-home sales appointment, one must absolutely, without question, create a relationship with the prospect as a means to achieving the sale. This relationship will be different than the relationship with your good friend, different from the one with your neighbor, your love interest, or your college buddies, but it will be a relationship.

Building a relationship isn't something you do TO someone, it's something you do WITH someone. And to be successful in these types of selling scenarios, the relationship has to be there, because you likely won't get a second chance to sell if you come up empty on the first call. The prospect will be on to his next appointment with your competitor, and if your competitor is able, he'll button up the business while you're left on the sidelines watching from afar.

The same thing holds true in selling jewelry, furniture, fine clothing, or cosmetics at retail. Or selling basement finishing, custom closets, landscaping, or home remodeling in the home. We may never see the customer again (therefore, a relationship after the sale is a moot point), but the relationship almost always has to be there if we're going to win the business.

Most people who sell to consumers don't act as account managers (insurance and financial products are two exceptions). Once the transaction is complete, the relationship, if it exists at all, is of minimal importance. "The relationship begins after the sale?" Nope. I don't think so. Not in the B2C world.

"If there are no results, there is no relationship. Period!"

I disagree with this statement for reasons I've already stated. In my world (consumer selling), there is a relationship, and almost always that relationship exists from the point of contact to the close of the sale, and rarely lasts longer than that.

"If there are no results, there is no relationship" strikes me as being a "which came first, the chicken or the egg" dilemma. Having said that, in B2C selling, the relationship almost always comes first.

Francesca at the gourmet store probably has one chance to sell you a set of All-Clad stainless steel cookware for a thousand dollars or more. If you don't buy it from her, you'll likely go to another store, or order it online, or decide that something else has a higher priority in your life at this moment than cookware. Many consumer purchases take place in a very limited window of opportunity.

I offer this spin on Doyle's statement: "If you can't quickly create a relationship with your prospect, you probably don't have a sale."

"Do you really think the majority of your prospects are interested in building a relationship? We might be pretty good people, but I don’t think any of us are that cool."

If you ask your prospects if they're interested in building a relationship, they'll say no. I agree with Doyle here. But I can also say that consumer prospects prefer to have a positive and productive interaction with their appliance salesperson or their interior designer at the end of the day. As salespeople, we shoot ourselves in the foot when we don't create a positive relationship, albeit a usually short-lived one, with our prospects.

Our prospects probably don't want us to ask for the sale, either. But we still do it. We have to to excel.

"Ok, point made. Let’s transition to look at our current client base."

Many of us in consumer selling don't have much of a "current client base."

While the B2B salesperson has the luxury of getting ongoing orders for steel or paper products or industrial finishes, or IT services, we B2C folks hunker down and look for new selling opportunities. You can make a nice sale selling window treatments to your prospect today, but aside from selling them window coverings at their second home or for their new home when they move in seven years, you're not going to get much repeat business from your customer (again, there are some exceptions, like insurance and financial services).

In my opinion, it's must more important to maximize your relationships with all your prospects, whether those relationships last five minutes, half-an-hour, or several hours (or if you're lucky enough to leverage a longer-term relationship into ongoing revenue). If you want to sell more, get better at creating relationships quickly.

That reminds me: Years ago I created a sales training program for a national chain of furniture stores called "Have a Relationship with a Customer." The point of the training was to look at the sales interaction as a relationship, not just two ships passing in the night.

Thanks, Doyle, for your thought-provoking post. Let the discussion continue!

[One of my favorite sales books is Relationship Selling, the 8 competencies of top sales producers by Jim Cathcart. Although this book has a bit of a business-to-business bias, it's filled with great insight and wise recommendations.]

If you like this post (or don't) please leave a comment. Skip Anderson is the Founder and President of Selling to Consumers Sales Training. He works with companies and individuals who sell to consumers in B2C, retail, in-home selling, and the financial, real estate, and insurance markets.

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Comments

[gerhard gschwandtner]

Great points. Most salespeople confuse transactions with relationships. It's all about the relationship! You got it.
http://www.sellingpower.typepad.com
Gerhard

P.S. I am trying to keep up with your prolific blogs

[Skip Anderson]

Gerhard,

Thanks for stopping by, and also the words of support.

I'm trying to keep up with my blogs, too!

That reminds me, it's time to renew my subscription to Selling Power Magazine...

Skip